i think it’s cute when someone admits they have a crush on you
i think it’s a fucking miracle
//This began the rise of Aperture Science.
SPRTIZ THIS SHIT ON YOUR DICK AND YOUR E HARD FOR LIFETHAT IS NOT THE INTENDED USE, SIR
SPRAY IT ON YOUR NIPPLES
U L T I M A T E N I P P L E S
T H A T I S N O T T H E I N T E N D E D U S E S I R
we were in the middle of a full dress rehearsal today, music all intense and blaring, and suddenly everything stops and there’s a moment of silence before the director yells “WHOSE. BAGEL. IS ON. THE STAGE.”
my aesthetic is alcoholic drinks that taste like they have no alcohol in them
A makeout session would be great right about now
"I’ve never had fans in the younger generation before, so that’s really cool."
self diagnosing is so hard because everytime you’re like “maybe I am mentally ill” theres also a big part of you going “nah you’re probably just a naturally lazy/nasty/disgusting/useless person trying to find an excuse for your behavior” because of the institutionalized ableism that runs through everything
So go to the doctor and get an actual diagnosis?
Why don’t poor people just buy more money?
- me to all my friends: YOU CAN DO IT. YOU MAKE YOUR OWN LIFE. LET'S DO THIS TOGETHER. COME ON!!!
- me to myself: you fucking piece of shit you will amount to nothing nothing is worth it your feelings are irrational go sleep for 22 hours
i feel like i am not here anymore
fun statistics for adults!
“when I was a kid, I had no help with college tuition, I was hardworking and paid it all myself”
-Annual tuition for Yale, 1970: $2,550
-Annual tuition for Yale, 2014: $45,800
-Minimum Wage, 1970: $1.45
-Minimum Wage, 2014: $7.25
-Daily hours at minimum wage needed to pay for tuition in 1970: 4.8
-Daily hours at minimum wage needed to pay for tuition in 2014: 17.3
I WANT A TRUE HORROR MOVIE WHERE ALL THE CHARACTERS ARE INTELLIGENT AND DO ALL THE RIGHT THINGS AND TAKE ALL THE PROPER PRECAUTIONS BUT STILL WIND UP GETTING KILLED BY THE ANTAGONIST
NOTHING IS SCARIER THAN DOING EVERYTHING YOU CAN IN VAIN AND STARING IN THE FACE OF FUTILITY
(plus I would like not to yell at the characters for being dumb for once)
one time i actually thought i had a chance with someone